Captains that say "I'm laid back"

[regionaltard]

my favorite brief from a captain?

"I am an FFDO. If anyone tries to breach the cockpit, I will defend it. You will fly the plane and talk on the radio. If you attempt to open the cockpit door in this scenerio, I am authorized to SHOOT YOU"

No kidding

And I meant every word of it!

 

[MALSR]

In the name of all that is holy, DO NOT touch anything that is:

a. Red in color

b. Has dust on it

Thank you.

Awesome^ I'm using that

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

Captain leadership at the majors is pretty poor also there scooter

I wouldn't know...how so??

 

[Captn]

Hi my name is Captn D-Head....Gear Up, Flaps Up, Shut Up.

 

[buscap]

What is with you captains that say "I'm laid back" in the pre-briefing? These are the guys that end up being totally anal every time. As soon as I hear those words from a captain I cringe and say to myself "this is going to be a long 4-day." You know what, the guys that aren't anal are the ones that don't have to self-proclaim their so called laid back nature before flying with someone.

Hey,

I was freaki'n laid back until you forgot to take the garbage out!!!

Do your job and I won't be "anal", you little turd shooter!!

 

[doh]

You are all forgetting "don't let me wake up and catch you sleeping"!:laugh:

 

[PositionandHold]

Mookie hit it right on the head... predictable and consistent

What about the one captain who is predictably and consistently an a$$.

 

[BAe3100FO]

But does s/he pick up the bar tab?

THAT is the question...

I used to think a good Captain would get me home safe without any extra paper work. Now I know it's the ones who do that and let me drink on their dime.

The tradition continues...

 

[FL717]

Brief:

I will try to be 100% standard by the book.... and I will fail miserably.

Pointing and laughing at me doesn't help.

Do not let me wake up and catch you reading the newspaper... unless it has pictures, TV Schedule, or a sports section.

If you fart... game on!

Please don't put your lips on anything in the cockpit.

This is a group effort open book essay style session.... cheating IS allowed.

That is all.

 

[Otto]

wonder what impression the NTSB & FAA thinks when they listen to the blackbox and hear those words after an incident..

If there is an incident or accident, they are going to blame you no matter what you say.