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just flew a 3-day with "special radio voice guy"...

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In front of DAL 3 weeks ago, ???-LAX and 25L was closed. He checked in with "DAL 1234, ILS 25rrrrrraaaaaa". Even the controller stopped for 20 sec to laugh his ass off.
 
The other month I was flying over India and a Delta pilot checked in with Mumbai or Chennai control, can't remember. Then he started complaining about the "scratchy radios with a squeal in the background." No problems there as I agree Indian ATC facilities are generally crap. But then he went on in a very condescending tone to say "I've been telling you guys this for years and you still haven't fixed it!" Then of course my non-american FO looked over to me with one of those, Why are Americans such Dou-chebags looks....?

I was flying with a crusty Capt. years ago who told me a story of when Delta first started flying over the pond (At the end of the era where the only flag carriers were Pan Am and TWA). This Capt. swore this was true: The Delta was being yelled at for starting the crossing without a oceanic clearance. "But Gander, we got our clearance in ATLANTA"!
 
Followed a Jetblue guy across the country who signed off with each controller saying "make it a great day". He sounded like Richard Simmons.
 
Yeah, I love it when a controller is working a tough sector with almost every airplane wanting deviations and you can tell he is having a rough day yet a pilot signs off with a useless meaningless "Have a nice day". Even if a controller sounds like he's doing fine and actually having a nice day, there is no need to order the controller to have a nice day or weekend. I mean ....why? Who doesn't want to have a nice day or weekend and need to be ordered to? More often than not, all it does is block the controllers next transmission as he thought your were done when you read the frequency back. These controllers hear this crap for almost 8 hours a day so it becomes just useless noise and blather to them but apparently some pilots love to have a chance just to say a few more words. I invite people to see George Carlins rant on "Have a nice day" on You Tube.

Oh yes, love the guys who ask the controller " Whadya need?" When asked their speed, as if the controller wasn't going to tell them.

Another one - at the flight levels, if a controller points out traffic, it is a just courtesy thing so you won't be startled. Unless he asks you to let him know that you have the traffic in sight, do not clog up the frequency minute later saying you have the traffic. He really doesn't care or need to know. YOU WEREN'T REQUESTED TO REPORT THE TRAFFIC, SO DON'T.

Yes to the deviation thing. The controller has been working the sector for a while and also sees some weather radar and is well aware of the weather. No need to tell him you need to deviate "for weather". That is, unless you need to deviate for something he doesn't know about like a house or aircraft carrier floating in the sky.
 
Just reminded of another pet peeve. If you're inside the FAF and approach hasn't yet switched you to tower, JUST CALL TOWER ON YOUR OWN!!! You don't need to ask permission by that point. Sheesh!
 
My biggest pet peeve is all the pilots who cry about everything and any thing on msg boards.
Lighten up, nobody cares!
 
When giving a pax briefing, why on earth do some of you feel it necessary to read an ATIS? Who gives a fluffernutter what direction the wind is blowing in ABQ? Or what the visibility is, or that the cloud layer is Broken?
 
Or your military fighter background briefing, get over it already, you're a friggin civilian now
 
Better yet, don't do a pre-take off passenger PA at all. They already know what airline and flight number they are on, they already know where they are going, and you can bet they already have a pretty good idea of the weather at the destination. They've been listening to PAs and been getting yelled at since the minute they set foot in the airport so why add to the blather? These pilot PAs are usually little more than ego driven useless noise. Have some mercy and quit doin' em!
 

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